My Top 10 FtM Transition Discoveries

My whole childhood and recent adult life were filled with the feeling of something not being right, not fitting in. Puberty was a living hell; those things that began sprouting from my chest felt so alien and utterly wrong to me. As an adult I experienced significant bouts of depression, and had trouble controlling my alcohol intake. Gender Dysphoria started rearing its’ head in ugly ways as I got older, leading to my realization and my need to transition.

This my personal list of things I experienced or that surprised me as I transitioned from female to male and taking testosterone

Top 10 Things I Discovered About Transitioning with Testosterone

1. There are many ways to take testosterone

I was very surprised to learn that there are many ways that you can introduce testosterone into the body. Self-injection was what appealed to me, it’s  just once a week and you’re done. If the thought of a needle creeps you out, you can consider using a testosterone carrier cream that you rub daily into your skin, and let it be absorbed before putting clothes on. I have seen just as wonderful transformations with this method as with the weekly shots. There are other methods too, but I am just talking about my experience and what I’ve seen around me.

2. Voice drop

Most guys notice a gradual lowering of their voice, which becomes obvious at around 3 months. I feel I continued after that, and it took a while for my brain to get used to my lower voice, so I had that awkward high-low voice thing for a while ! Singing in choir helped me to widen my vocal range and get more used to the lower tones.

3. I got hairier

I had no hair before I started on testosterone, now I have a little goatee and visible hair on my arms and legs. Some guys grow awesome facial hair 3 – 6 months, not me though.

4. My fat distribution changed

The fat moved away from my boobs onto my belly. Dropping some weight helped to reduce that developing belly, and another advantage for me was since guys tend to have less body fat percentage, it’ll helped me present in a more masculine manner.

5. Muscle development

You’ll do well to go to the gym and work all your muscles using weight-bearing exercises. You might experience growing pains in your muscles. My doctor recommended Calcium-Magnesium supplements with vitamin C, which worked for me.

6.  Genital changes

You’ll experience a growing of the organ down there, and some guys experience growing pains. I didn’t. You may want to rename this part of you, there are  many names out there including dicklet (my favourite). Also, and this sounds gross but stay with me, your uterus gradually changes, becomes less lubricated and “atrophies” after around 3 or 4 years on testosterone, so your Doctor will probably recommended a hysterectomy sometime after that.

7. Some permanent changes

Items 2,6 (and I believe, to a degree 3) are permanent changes, even if u come off testosterone.

8. Testosterone increased my libido 

My libido increased from almost zero to OMG!

9. My sexuality changed

For most of my life I identified as a bisexual, although people tended to assume I was straight if I was with a guy, or a lesbian if I was a woman; although I never identified as a lesbian, myself. As I settled more into my transition and accepted my own masculinity, I realized I was gay.

10. My sexual health became front and centre as a gay man

Although most of my sex life involved men over my lifetime, I had been in relationships with women for many years before I transitioned; I had become used to being at the lowest risk category in the sexual health arena. As a shifted into being transgender man who has sex with men, safety during sex became more present for me. Although there are many wonderful, safe-sex practising men out there, there is real risk of coming across men who honestly don’t know that they are positive; there’s a window of 6 weeks to 3 months where HIV+ antibodies will not show up in tests. To me now, condoms are an essential part of my safe practice.

Top 5 Hypnosis Myths

Hypnotherapy has been around for a long time; it was used in the Healing Temples of Egypt, and has now become accepted as an effective mainstream method of making change in peoples lives. Unfortunately there are a few myths that are still in many peoples minds about what hypnosis is.

1. The Puppet Myth

You are more aware of your surroundings when in the hypnotic state. When in hypnosis you are accessing your sub conscious mind, it is an active problem solver and is able to access all of your memories.

  • You only take yourself into trance if you feel safe
  • You can bring yourself back at any time
  • You will not give away any secrets
  • You are in control

2. The Memory Myth

Stage hypnotists are specially trained to create the illusion that they have control, and create the temporary illusion of forgetfulness in those participants that are open to it. I practice a therapeutic and holistic hypnosis where you are in control.

  • Stage hypnosis entertains others, similar to a magician
  • Therapeutic hypnosis empowers you
  • You will always know where you are
  • You will recall everything you choose to

3. The Ignorance Myth

Many people feel they won’t know when they are in a trance state, but in fact you have many signals that let you know

  • Body feels heavy & sleepy
  • Mind alert & ready to work
  • Very aware of your surroundings
  • Mild tingling in your extremities
  • Lightly fluttering eye lids
  • Swallowing more often

4. The Control Freak Myth

Most people think they aren’t hypnotizable, especially self-confessed ‘Control Freaks’.  In fact, 95% of people are hypnotizable, and when you decide to take control of your actions, you make it a very powerful tool for change ! Take the Quiz

I invite you to research hypnosis and determine for yourself how safe and natural the process is; visit our links for a starting point. You are always in control and your subconscious mind will not take you anywhere you are not ready to go.

5. The Master Controller Myth

I do not put you into hypnosis, you take yourself into hypnosis ! In fact, no-one can use hypnosis against another’s will. If I was to make a suggestion that you didn’t completely agree with, it would effectively just “bounce off” your mind and you wouldn’t do it !
Really, all hypnosis is self-hypnosis.

Past Life Regression Ponderings

In my dozen years of doing past life regression, I have noticed that every single session is as individual as the clients fingerprint !

Although I use the same core method, that of creating a gentle altered state using hypnotic trance, each person is guided to experience what they need in that moment. I have had just as many clients who thoroughly experience one lifetime from beginning to end, as those who launch from one lifetime into another after another, after another !

Some of those clients see nothing except darkness, and yet they feel such a richness of emotion and boosted intuitive sense of  what’s happening, it feels so alive within them. A few clients have experienced what can only be described as a full-colour movie of their experience, along with sound, smells and sensations !

Many years ago now, I was working with a client to help him modify his thoughts to more positive patterns. However, after a few sessions, we saw less change than was anticipated, and we decided to use past life regression, targeting the root cause of the negative thinking patterns. Straight away he found himself in a previous lifetime where he was in a farmhouse, he was surprised to discover he was a mom to two, and was standing in the kitchen, loading wood into a big wood-fired oven. Hearing a noise outside, she could tell something was bothering the hens. Going out, it was dark and she made her way over to the henhouse. A critter had been there, probably a fox, there was a small hole in the fence. She blocked it up as best she could, in the pitch black. Standing up, she noticed a glow … the house was aflame ! Soon the house was engulfed in flames, and she couldn’t find a way back into the house. At this point he jumped forwards in time, to when the kids had perished in the fire, and she was feeling wracked with guilt, this lasted for the whole of the rest of her life. Back in this lifetime, it became clear to him that he had been holding onto that blame, and had been constantly afraid he was going to do something bad.

By re-experiencing that traumatic time, he was able to see that this was something from that previous lifetime, he felt a releasing taking place, like his body-knowing  had an ‘ah-ha!’ moment. From there onwards, the all-consuming feelings of negativity towards himself released their hold, and he could finally be at peace.

I’m not saying that this can happen for everyone, but for this gentleman, it profoundly changed his life for the better.

I’d love to hear some of your past life regression experiences !

 

Dreaming of Bee Man

I’m blogging to share dreams, pass on messages of hope that I receive, and to share insights – be they spiritual, philosophical or physical in nature.

Last night I had a dream that I was with a friend, and we were looking at this insurmountable mountain that had, what looked like chunks of concrete walls from previous civilizations poking out of its’ side.

Dream Chapter 2 – a huge backhoe has filled the side of the mountain with mud/sand, compressing it into the mountain, then forming steps – first up and to the right, then up and to the left, alternating on each floor, all the way up to the top of the mountain.

Dream Chapter 3 – After having climbed up the makeshift stairs, we found ourselves standing on grass and looking out over what looked like a cross between High Park and Welsh mountain tops, because off in the distance was a fenced off tennis court.

Dream Chapter 4 – Approaching the tennis court, a lone figure was standing, leaning backwards at an awkward angle. Getting closer, I noticed he had a huge nose. Standing next to him, he seemed to sigh, releasing his breath and taking a big gulp of air as he tilted his head back for a moment. He blinked his eye, which had a bee flying very close to his eyball. His left eye was squashed, partially closed by his huge nose outcrop – which was a bees’ nest. At that moment a bee left the nest, buzzed around just below the mans nose, and returned.Where the mans’ nose ended and the bee colony began was not clear to me.

How had this situation developed? Was it a symbiotic relationship that benefited all, or was someone suffering at the expense of another?

Hypnotherapy, Reiki, offering Healing for Improved Mind, Body & Soul